monkeymom's Diaryland Diary
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Short skirt and long jacket
Rachel came to work tonight to bring me dinner and to get out of the house for a while and we were talking about her relationship with Jason. She told me that he is making plans to do some things over Thanksgiving break with her friend Erin, who will be in town then, and then she laughed and said she knows it's stupid of her, but she hopes that he hooks up with Erin then, so that her own relationship with him will be over, and it won't be up to her to end it.
I said that I thought it was so cute in the beginning when they were happy and talking on the phone and chatting online for hours every day, and I wondered how it all went bad so quickly. (You know I'm still feeling like it was all my fault.)
Rachel said that it was fun at first but then after he got upset and they started arguing about it all, it became work! She can't just sail along and have fun with it, she has to write him little notes that say she is thinking of him, and she has to listen to him on the phone and pretend she's interested and find him fascinating. I think that pretty much indicates that the romance is over, don't you?
I told her that she should write a guest entry for my journal because she was saying some clever things, and here is what she wrote:
"What went wrong - everything was cool and then...It became work. Like training a monkey. You have to give it cookies to reinforce good behavior. Surprise pats on the head make it feel appreciated. But if you neglect the monkey for a day or more, it will maul you the next time you come into the cage."
So now she is wondering when she is ever going to meet someone who doesn't have to be trained and "handled" because every guy she has ever gone with has problems and insecurities and she would just like someone to relax and have fun with.
I was thinking about that after she left, and I think the answer is that you never find someone who doesn't need to be handled in some way. We all need to feel appreciated, and we need to receive those little tokens of affections, like flowers and notes and expensive jewelry, or in Diana's case, cell phones.
11:21 p.m. - 2001-10-03
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