monkeymom's Diaryland Diary

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In which I am not an animal doctor, I just play one on TV.

When I got home from work this morning, there were some dirty dishes in the sink and a note on the counter from Kim:

I wondered what toxic substance Kim could have gotten on the scissors? Carefully not touching them, I looked them over as best I could, but they looked fine; not even dirty! Hmmm.

Rich came in from walking the dog, and I showed him the note, but he didn't know anything about the scissors, either. We both felt the temptation that one feels when confronted by a red button that says Do Not Push, so I used the tongs to lift the scissors out of the sink, put them into a clear plastic box from the grocery store that had previously contained cookies, and snapped the lid shut. Then I took the box and note and moved them to the kitchen table, so that we could use the counter again.

I went upstairs to get ready for bed, but while I was brushing my teeth, I just wanted to know, so I went into Kim's room and said, "Hey!" She looked up from under the covers (she sleeps with the blankets over her head, even in the summer, for protection from spooky stuff, and spiders), and I asked "What happened to the scissors in the kitchen sink?"

Kim blinked at me and said, "Oh, Patsy had some poop on his buttfur, so I used those scissors to cut it off." Nice. And then instead of rinsing them with HOT WATER, she just dropped them in the sink and left us a note that hinted at radium contamination!

So there you go, if it's not a dog bleeding all over the house, the cat gets his butt nasty. I just wish we had a few more animals in our house.

Speaking of the dog, I took her to the vet yesterday for her pre-surgical check, and the vet rudely said that the dog is overweight! Excuse me? Sheepdogs are supposed to have well-covered ribs! She's well-covered! The vet's assistant was tsk-ing over the obesity of the dog, too, and I barely refrained from pointing that both the vet and the assistant had pretty well-covered ribs, too!

The vet also cleaned the dog's chronically irritated ear and prescribed antibiotics and an antihistimine! Good! We might finally get this cleared up!

So I took the dog home with her two bottles of pills - two of each, morning and night. Four pills, twice a day. Those pills? They are huge! I thought I'd better get her started on them, so I got a slice of cheese to wrap them in, put two pills in half a slice (maybe I should buy Lite cheese, since she's so freakin' fat!) and I gave it to the dog, expecting her to gulp it down like she usually does. Nope. Maybe she doesn't trust me. She ate the cheese and chewed the pills a little before dropping them, broken, out of her mouth to the floor.

I gave her the second two pills wrapped in the other half of the cheese, and she again ate the cheese, and spit the pills, broken, out onto the floor. So I pried her mouth open, scooped up the broken pills and the wet bits of cheese, and shoved them in, further back on her tongue, and then rubbed her throat to make her swallow them.

That damn dog just juggled them around inside her mouth and pushed them out the side! I shoved them back in with my fingers, and held her mouth shut while she juggled them around more, and when she tried to push them back out, I shoved them back in again. She ended up with green foam from the capsules on her muzzle, but she ate most of the pills.
Rich is in charge of giving her the pills now

3:58 a.m. - 2005-12-04
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