monkeymom's Diaryland Diary
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And you can't get me a pop with ice in it?
Happy Birthday Scott! Scott is 22 today and he made beef stew with dumplings for supper! He is so the man! We've been giving him gifts every day for the last 3 days, and he said it was like Hannakuh because he got something every day, but it was really because it was easy and fun to buy stuff this year because he wants and needs a lot of cooking supplies! I don't really think it's spoiling him because he's too nice to spoil and also, when your birthday is this close to Christmas, and your neurotic interestingly zany mother finds the holidays depressing, well, sometimes you don't have the best birthdays ever. So he deserves this one!
We all went to see the new Lemony Snicket movie in the theater and you know I have issues with that, but in the spirit of doing whatever the birthday boy wants, and also because the movie looked cool in the television ads, I was pretty excited to go. Kim had her doubts about the whole venture because she knows that I'm neurotic wary about going to the theater to see a movie, and she reminded me that it was A. opening night and B. the early show that was likely to be full of kids. She suggested that we go on Monday, instead, but Scott wanted to go tonight, and so did I, really.
We got to the theater early and went to sit in the fourth row, and the theater was full of kids! You know that my superpower is the ability to attract morons to sit behind me in the movies, and oh yeah, the superpower tractor beam was working full force and about 50, well maybe it only half a dozen, 12 year old girls were pulled into my magnetic field. They were complete idiots! They started babbling about Frodo and Sam when a clip from LOTR showed before the movie, and then one of them announced to the others that Gandalf was gay, "I mean really gay!" "He's gay?" "Who's gay?" "Gandalf, he's really gay!"
Apparently the actor who plays Gandalf is really, really gay, gayer than ordinarily gay, so freaking gay that he is on the recruiting posters for gay. I was dying to tell them that Frodo is also rumored to be gay and therefore they could stop sighing over him, too, but I just knitted and ground my teeth in helpless fury, because they were only 12, and not my own children, so I didn't expose them to my sarcasm blasters.
I did finally, about two minutes before the movie started, turn around to the most irritating one (the one sitting right behind me of course) and said, kindly, "You're going to have to be quiet when the movie starts, in a couple of minutes," and she nodded and said, "Okay," and then she actually started keeping her voice down! So that made me happy, and I was able to be zen about the few comments she did make during the movie because she was using her quiet voice. After the movie, all the 12 year olds were very pissed off because "It was a great movie, but they just murdered the book!" Yeah, that's what happens when a book is made into a movie; learn it now, kiddies.
After the movie, and the long credit crawl that you know we always have to sit through, and guess what? When you are in a movie full of kids, they all leave immediately after the show and you can watch the credits in blessed silence, then we drove around town to admire everyone's Christmas decorations, and OMG, I have to get a picture of the place where they have a pink porta-john on the lawn with white twinkle lights all over it, and a big blow-up Santa next to it!
And then we went home and ate birthday cheesecake with raspberry sauce and it was wonderful.
And you know what I always say to Scott; I carried you in my body for nine months and suffered through hours of agonizing labor to give you life, back labor, buddy! Happy birthday son!
11:59 p.m. - 2004-12-17
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